My New Names

Swiped From Laurie


MY REAL NAME: Shelli

MY DETECTIVE NAME: (my favorite color and my favorite animal)

Cobalt Otter

MY SOAP OPERA NAME: (my middle name and a street I lived on)

Renae Gorham

MY STAR WARS NAME: (first 3 letters of my last name first 2 letters of my first name)

Weish

MY SUPERHERO NAME: (my second favorite color and my favorite drink)

Red Margarita

MY WITNESS PROTECTION NAME: (my parents' middle names)

Lynn Lou

MY GOTH NAME: (the color black and the name of one of my pets)

Black Molly

MY PORN NAME: (the name of one of my pets and either my mother's maiden name or a street I lived on)

Sugar Tobacco

Happy Thanksgiving!

Thank you Scott for a new way to fix my Thanksgiving dinner!

Your dinner will be the talk of the TOWN!! You should try this! Sure to bring smiles from your guests!

Here is a new way to prepare your Thanksgiving Turkey:

1. Cut out aluminum foil in desired shapes.
2. Arrange the turkey in the roasting pan, position the foil carefully. (see attached picture for details)
3. Roast according to your own recipe and serve.
4. Watch your guests' faces...

Still in Shock

Ok, I have to admit that I am still in shock over the Recycled Used Condoms in my last post! No big plans for the weekend other than we will be finalizing our plans for our trip to the Maldives.

Recycle Your Used Condoms!

I know you stay awake at night worrying about our ever filling landfils and how you can help the situation. Well here is a way you can help!

China: Used condoms recycled as hair ties used condoms are being recycled into hair bands and hair ties in southern China, threatening to spread sexually-transmittable diseases they were originally meant to prevent, state media reported yesterday. In the latest example of potentially harmful Chinese-made products, rubber hair bands have been found in local markets and beauty salons in Dongguan and Guangzhou cities in southern Guangdong province, the China daily newspaper said. “These cheap and colourful rubber bands and hair ties sell well ... threatening the health of local people,” it said. Despite being recycled, the hair bands could still contain bacteria and viruses, it said. “People could be infected with Aids, (genital) warts or other diseases if they hold the rubber bands or strings in their mouths while weaving their hair into plaits or buns,” the daily quoted a local dermatologist as saying. A bag of 10 of the recycled bands sells for just 25 fen (4 cents), much cheaper than others on the market, accounting for
their popularity, the newspaper said. A government official was quoted as saying that recycling condoms was illegal. China’s manufacturing industry has been tarnished this year by a string of scandals involving shoddy or dangerous goods made for domestic and foreign markets. It has launched a public relations blitz aimed at playing up efforts to strengthen monitoring systems. — AFP (As published in the 14 November issue of Today)

Now I bet this raises a whole new set of questions: 1) Do they have collection bins? 2) Can people pick them up and turn them in for cash, like aluminum cans? 3) Who gets to wash them? 4) Are they washed? 5) Where do they get them?

Lowe's refuses to call them Christmas Trees

The following is an exert from an email I received from American Family Association:

In their Holiday 2007 catalog, containing 56 pages of Christmas gifts, Lowe's advertises hundreds of gift items, including scores of "Family trees." In fact, the word "Christmas" only appears two times in the entire holiday catalog. The ads mentioning "Christmas cover only 12 square inches of the 5236 square inches available.
Lowe's even has one of their Family trees turned upside down on a stand. We are not sure what the significance of that is.
Lowe's evidently did not want to offend any non-Christians, therefore they replaced "Christmas tree" with "Family tree." Of course, if Christians are offended that is evidently ok.
An on-line search of Lowe's does reference some "Christmas" items. In fact, a word search of their Web site gives the exact same number 174 of the word "Christmas" as it does the word "holiday." Most of the items mentioning Christmas appear to use the promotional line given by the manufacturer.
Their Holiday 2007 catalog features scores of products, including lights, wreaths, trees, and yard decorations. Most people would associate these items with Christmas, but not Lowe's! Except for two obscure references, they refer to everything in their catalog as "holiday."

Click here to see the front cover of the catalog and a page featuring their "Family trees." catalog ad.

Take Action:
Send the e-mail to Lowe's. Ask them why they refer to their Christmas trees as "Family trees."
Forward this to your friends and family and ask them to send the e-mail.

I guess making sure that the rights of Christians are upheld along with all the other religious groups is something I feel strongly about.

17 Reasons Why Alcohol Should Be Served At Work

1. It's an incentive to show up.
2. It leads to more honest communications.
3. It reduces complaints about low pay.
4. Employees tell management what they think, not what management wants to hear.
5. It encourages car pooling.
6. Increase job satisfaction because if you have a bad job, you don't care.
7. It eliminates vacations because people would rather come to work.
8. It makes fellow employees look better.
9. It makes the cafeteria food taste better.
10. Bosses are more likely to hand out raises when they are wasted.
11. Salary negotiations are a lot more profitable.
12. Employees work later since there's no longer a need to relax at the bar.
13. It makes everyone more open with their ideas.
14. Eliminates the need for employees to get drunk on their lunch break.
15. Increases the chance of seeing your boss naked.
16. Employees no longer need coffee to sober up.
17. Sitting on the copy machine will no longer be seen as "gross."




Take a beer and send the truck to all of your
friends!!!!!!


^^ ^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^\
B u d w e i s e r _ '""""\___,
__.. _____ _l _ l
([""(@)'(@)"""""""""""""""""**(@)(@)**

You Never Know

what you might see at a Singapore Slingers game. Take a look at one of the box sponsors:
Yep, it says: RateMyTurban.com

Yankee or Dixie?

Go take the Quiz. Be sure to come back and let me know how you did. I was 94% Dixie. It asked me, "Is General Lee your father?"

Oktoberfest 2007

Singapore probably isn't the first place you think of when you think of Oktoberfest, is it? Wasn't mine either but when I saw tickets for sale for this years Erdinger Beer Oktoberfest I thought, hey...what the heck. So, last weekend that's where Rob and I went. There was a ton of people there and I was really surprised at the number of Asians there. It looked like everyone was having a great time. The beer girls don't quite look like the stereotypical Bavarian beer girls, it was quite humorous to me. And after the food was gone and everyone had consumed a few beers it was no longer suitable to stand on the floor, nope, you had to stand on the tables. Rob and I were asking each other what we thought the "SWL" (safe working load - for the non-engineers out there) was for the tables. We did buy a couple of nice ceramic beer mugs. We passed on the huge beer glass, but was considering it for Blair to dunk her ring in - again! We would have liked to have purchased a couple of T-shirts but they weren't selling any. Someone goofed there, that would have been a money maker. Bet they would have sold better than the funny looking felt hats that made you look like a cone-head.

Here is a good reason...

...why you don't want your kids to go to t.u.! What's wrong with this picture? Check this guy out. I hope you can see the picture clear enough to tell he has on his burnt orange. BUT...did you notice his signs? If you read them like you see them they read, "Fence - D" and not "D - Fence". What a dork! We see this guy at all the Singapore Slinger games and at every game he holds up his signs the same way. Rob and Avery had seen him in all his burnt orange glory at a game when I was gone so we were waiting for him to have on his colors again so we could take a picture. Unfortunately, Rob didn't have his nice camera with a zoom lens at yesterday's game. I just hope this doesn't give a bad impression of the rest of us Texans (i.e. those of us from the state of Texas, not those that are fans, students, former students, etc. of t.u.)

B.T.W....the Slingers Won!!! They ended winning in overtime! It was a good game.

Test post from iphone

Trying to mobile blog while waiting on avery.

Sent from my iPhone

__________________________________________________
Do You Yahoo!?
Tired of spam? Yahoo! Mail has the best spam protection around

http://mail.yahoo.com

Who Doesn't Love 1977

Thank you Barbara for supplying me with subject matter for today's blog post. It has been a while since I've updated this thing! Sorry about that. Anyway...Barbara sent me this email with all the great pictures from the 1977 JC Penney catalog. I wanted to post them all, but here are a few of my favorites:

I think I've found my next dining room set which is apparently made by adding upholstery to old barrels.

I think my brother had this same outfit! The email read: How to get your ass kicked in elementary school! Just look at that belt. It's like a boob-job for your pants. He probably needed help just to lift it into place.. The belt loops have to be three inches long. And way to pull them up to your armpits, grandpa.

The email read: How to get your ass kicked on the golf course! This "all purpose jumpsuit" is, according to the description, equally appropriate for playing golf or simply relaxing around the house. Personally, I can't see wearing this unless you happen to be relaxing around your cell in D-block. Even then, the only reason you should put this thing on is because the warden made you, and as a one-piece, it's slightly more effective as a deterrent against ass-rapery.

The email read: Also, judging by the sheer amount of matching his/hers outfits, I'm guessing that in 1977 it was considered pretty stylish for couples to dress alike. These couples look happy, don't they?

The rest were all hillarious! Maybe tomorrow I'll post some more.